| 1 | You have absolutely no idea where your shoes are. |
| 2 | You've just had to get someone to help you pull your pants up in the ladies room. |
| 3 | You suddenly decide you want to kick someone's ass. |
| 4 | In your last trip to "pee" you realize you now look more like Tammy Faye Baker than the goddess you were just four hours ago. |
| 5 | You drop your 3:00 a.m. burrito on the floor, pick it up and carry on eating. |
| 6 | You start crying. |
| 7 | There are less than three hours before you're due to start work. |
| 8 | You've found a deeper side to the office nerd. |
| 9 | The man you're flirting with used to be your 5th grade teacher. |
| 10 | The urge to take off articles of clothing, stand on a table and sing becomes strangely overwhelming. |
| 11 | You've forgotten where you live. |
| 12 | You've started to sound like Jessie Ventura from the cigarettes you've smoked, because (as you've mentioned like 10x's by now) you only smoke when you drink. |
| 13 | You yell at the bartender, who (you think) cheated you by giving you just tonic, but that's just because you can no longer taste the gin or vodka. |
| 14 | You think you're in bed, but your pillow feels strangely like pizza. |
| 15 | You start every conversation with a booming, "Don't take this the wrong way but..." |
| 16 | You fail to notice that the toilet lid's down when you sit on it. |
| 17 | Your sloppy hugs begin to resemble wrestling take-down moves. |
| 18 | You're tired so you just sit on the floor (and why not!). |
| 19 | You show your friends that girls can pee standing up if they really want to |
| 20 | You tell everyone how much you love them, including your boss. |
